My main goal is to build a portfolio of $1,120,000 in 1500 days*, starting from 1/1/2013 and ending in February of 2017. Every month, I provide an update on my status. It’s time to take a look at April.
Urban Dictionary, tell the readers what a Dumpster Fire is (Caution: naughty words ahead):
So yeah, my stock portfolio has been a dumpster fire lately. Not good.
Apple: The iPhone, Apple’s cash cow, has probably peaked. It is somewhat reassuring that one of Warren Buffett’s lieutenants (Ted Weschler or Todd Combs) just bought a billion dollars in shares for Berkshire Hathaway.
Dumpster Fire Rating: Mostly smoke. This one isn’t going to burn the portfolio down.
Lending Club: The CEO was caught up in some naughty, naughty business. So far, it isn’t looking good for him.
Dumpster Fire Rating: Small inferno. Keep back people. This one could get worse…
Solar City: This company issued crappy guidance and is burning through loads of cash in it’s very own dumpster fire. Mr. Market is not impressed.
Dumpster Fire Rating: Not as hot as the Sun, but getting there. This fire will either be extinguished or this company’s story will flame out in blaze of gory dumpster fire glory.
Tesla Motors: Mr. Market doubts Elon Musk’s ability to produce the Model 3 in mass quantity. Musk hasn’t always been on target with his dates, but I have a feeling he’s going to pull this one off. Don’t bet against Musk. The dude lands rockets after all.
Dumpster Fire Rating: Nowhere near as hot as a lithium ion battery fire.
These dumpster fires are precisely why I don’t do much stock picking any more. Almost all invested money since I started this blog has gone into index funds. Simple, easy and effective. If I want to play, I buy sector specific funds like VGT.
Dumpster Fire Update: April!
April was a down month. My investment portfolio started at $1,111,360 and ended the month at $1,102,113:
It wasn’t all bad news though. In the middle of the month, I made my big money goal***. I can now retire! I haven’t yet, but think about it often. Stay tuned…
- Days elapsed: 121
- Days remaining: 245
- 2016 gains: $44,151 (including 401(k) and some after tax contributions)
- 2016 401(k) contributions: $29,750****
Since the start (1/1/2013)
- Days elapsed: 1215
- Days remaining: 285
- Gains since 1/1/2013: $516,070
- Needed to quit work ($1,120,000 in investments): Mission accomplished!
- Net worth*****: $1,352,113******
1500Days, now with 50% more Dumpster Fires!
Here are some other random Dumpster Fires in the 1500 household:
Crash: I hate insurance and usually sign up for the absolute minimum. A month ago, I realized that we were signed up for all kinds of crazy things with our auto insurance (car rental allowance? windshield repair?? low deductibles???). I immediately cut off all of the fat. Neither Mrs. 1500 nor I have had an accident since we’ve been married. Can you see where this is going? On Monday, Mrs. 1500 decided to change lanes. The problem was that someone was already in the next lane. Ooops! Everyone is fine and the damage is minimal, but wife, couldn’t you have at least waited a month? Too soon, too soon! (Mrs. 1500 note: This accident was entirely MR. 1500’s fault. HE was the one who changed the insurance limits. Coincidence? I think not…)
- P90x:I went to Chicago and then to Omaha for the Berkshire meeting. My 10 day layoff from exercise turned into 20+ days. Not good. Lucky you though; no pictures of my naked torso this month.
- Recovery shake meets the Macbook: I like Apple stuff. It lasts forever. Unless you’re stupid. I blew $2,000 on a fancy 15″ Macbook Pro in 2015. A couple weeks ago, I was typing away after my workout. Next to my Macbook was a recovery exercise shake. My clumsy ass hit the cup and dumped it all over the newish computer. Very bad words came out of my mouth. Before I could hit the power button to shut it down, the screen went black. More very, very bad words. Anyway, I dried the thing out and it is behaving normally. This dumpster fire may just have a happy ending. (Mrs. 1500 note: If Mr. 1500 had been successful in wiping out this computer, it would have been far more costly that my dent in the front quarter panel of an old Cavalier…)
For all of my whining, life is pretty good, so I’ll stop yapping and let you get back to your day.
In the meantime, stay away from those dumpster fires.
*My original goal was $1,000,000 and no debt, I later raised the goal by $120,000 to $1,120,000 because I will have debt in the form of a mortgage which I firmly believe in not paying it off. My compromise is to have enough money put away to cover the mortgage at the time of retirement. So, to retire today, I would need about $1,120,000.
**This is an affiliate link. If you sign up, the blog (me) makes some cold, hard cash. Personal Capital is a totally free and awesome way to keep watch over your investments. It’s worth it for the fee analyzer alone. I would never recommend anything that I don’t personally use and completely believe in, so give it a try. If you’ve already signed up through the link, please know that I am eternally grateful.
***My goal isn’t to have $1,120,000 at the end of 1500 days, but at any time before the day count was up. Why? It all goes back to the 4% Rule. Remember that our little friend, Mr. 4%, is nothing more than the most conservative safe withdrawal rate. So, if I were to quit my job now, I could spend about $44,000 in my first year of retirement. I’d stick very close to that number too because market valuations are ambitious. Let’s say that Mr. Market caught a cold tomorrow and my portfolio dropped down to $800,000. No big deal. This would mean I’d be safer stretching my spending a little north of 4%.
****My 401(k) contributions include my own, Mrs. 15oo’s, and the contributions from my corporation. Self-employment with a solo 401(k) is a very powerful savings tool. I should have done this years ago.
- Home equity
- Immense paint collection: We don’t have a basement and it gets cold here in the Colorado winter, so anything that can be damaged by freezing has to be stored in the house. Currently, all our paint is stored in the guest bedroom right next to the bed. Our house is like 5 different colors, but somehow, we ended up with about 50 different colors of paint. How did this happen?
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