Every Friday, I publish an update on my training. This is Update #8.
Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow
In Running Update #2, I mentioned that I’m not going to cut my hair until after the race on 3/31. This was a bad idea. I don’t like having hair. It’s just one more thing to complicate my life. With the rare exception of this race, as soon as my hair gets long enough that I have to brush it, I cut it all off. It is starting to get out of control now:
I’m so used to not having hair that I sometimes do stupid things. Earlier this week, I went to a school activity first thing in the morning. Because I’m so used to not brushing my hair, I forgot to do it (I take showers at night, so my hair is wild and crazy in the morning until I tame it). When I got home, I glanced in the mirror and my hair looked 10x worse than the picture on the right. Scary, I know. I’m surprised the school didn’t call the cops.
Another morning, I lumbered out of bed and greeted my young daughter:
- Me: Hi D, how are you?
- D <with a look of revulsion>: *groans*
- Me: What’s wrong? Why are you looking at me like that?
- D: It’s your hair dad. You look creepy. I’m going to start calling you Mr. Creeper.
The good news is that despite the advanced length of my hair, I haven’t found a need for hair conditioner. I remain steadfast in my belief that hair conditioner is a giant scam.
In worse news, I finally registered for the half-marathon. I was kinda hoping that I’d get hit by a pickup truck or attacked by a pack of dogs on one of my runs so I’d have an excuse not to do the half. Despite darting into traffic and routing myself past a home of angry Dobermans (and really, are they ever not angry?), I remain in perfect health. It looks like I’ll have to run, long hair and all. Sigh…
In better news, I discovered this on the half-marathon site:
PEEPS ON COURSE! And you know the race organizers are serious because they put it in pink and in all caps!
I LOVE PEEPS!
And you know I’m serious because I put it in huge letters and centered it all fancy.
Anyway, here is the image I have brewing in my mind’s eye:
I’m at mile 11 with only 2 to go. However, I’m broken and battered. My legs hurt. I’m sweating. I’m cold. Bad words fly from my mouth. Just when I think I can’t go another yard, what do I see? Peeps. Yes, Peeps. It’s at this point that I know I will make it. I grab like 38 of them and stuff them down my throat. Peeps are to me what spinach is to Popeye. I blow past fellow race participants Mr. WoW and JD. I cross the finish line with fists in the air and the crowd goes nuts!
My imagination got the best of me. Here is what will actually happen:
…I grab like 38 Peeps and stuff them down my throat. Three minutes later, my stomach protests the decision. Another minute later, I’m on the side of the course, huddled over. Seconds later, my stomach revolts and expells the Peeps, a liter of orange Gatorade and the box of Samoas I had for breakfast. Mr. WoW and JD laugh at my demise. The cops haul me off for public indecency.
You know when you’re about to do something stupid, but you do it anyway? It’s every day for me. So yes, I am going to stuff myself full of Peeps while I run.
This Week In Running
- Runs: 3
- Miles: 12
- Longest run: 6
This Year In Running
- Runs: 30
- Miles per run: 3.68
- Miles: 110.44 (goal is > 150)
- Days until half marathon: 29
2018 Activity (walking included)
- Total steps: 950,609
- Total miles: 449.88
Weight, Heart, Beer
- Weight: 157.0 (goal is < 150)
- Low resting heart rate for the week: 63 (goal is < 60)
- Beers consumed this week: 6
- Beers consumed this year: 43
- Beer ratio: 2.57 : 1 (2.57 miles ran per beer). Goal is > 3 : 1
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