1500 Days to Freedom

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Mrs. 1500 Chooses another Man

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Yesterday, I wrote about the dishwasher issue. That issue miraculously resolved itself (more on that next Monday). However, there are far worse problems in the 1500 household concerning the backup dishwasher (Mrs. 1500)…

It’s true, there is trouble in the 1500 household. Big, big trouble. And it involves Mrs. 1500 and another man.

I don’t know how to explain this gently, so I’ll get right to the point. Like a lot of modern day marital strife, it all started on the Internet where she first “met” him. I won’t go into all of the terrible details, so I’ll start with the most painful and shocking one. Bear with me; this hurts. Also note that portions of this post may not be suitable for younger readers.

It began with pictures he posted of himself. Not just any pictures ladies and gentlemen.

He took pictures of his you-know-what and posted them for the world to see. All over his website.

I can’t make this stuff up.

And let me tell you about his you-know-what. I don’t blame Mrs. 1500 because it’s one of the biggest ones I’ve ever seen on a man. The thing is so big, it probably has its own gravitational pull. Most men would be happy to have one half of his size. Seriously.

To make matters worse, this guy is married. What is the world coming to? Sigh…

Of course, I’m talking about Mr. Frugalwood’s beard and the bookcase he helped me design.

Let’s start with the beard:

Screen Shot 2016-03-11 at 4.22.13 PM

Did you see the size of that thing? He probably stores his lunch and baby supplies in there. I wouldn’t be surprised if he finds a long-lost hammer or greyhound in that thing some day.

I can’t even come close:

beards
Mr. Frugalwoods,    J$$$,    Me.

Mrs. 1500 chooses Mr. Frugalwoods

Oh yeah, and Mrs. 1500 chose Mr. Frugalwood’s bookcase design. Let’s backup a second.

I needed to build a bookcase for my home. This is new territory for me and since I knew that Mr. Frugalwoods was wise in the ways of working with wood, I reached out to him, asking for help and suggestions.

I sent him my idea:

Idea #1
Mr. 1500’s deisgn

Mr. Frugalwoods tweaked the design:

Design #2
Mr, Frugalwood’s design

Cool! Now I had two designs to choose from. I enthusiastically showed them to Mrs. 1500. Of course I knew she would pick my design. Until she didn’t:

I like Mr. Frugalwood’s design better.

I was devastated, hurt and broken, but moved ahead with the project anyway.

Note to the reader: If you couldn’t care less how I built this thing, skip down to the “You can do It!” section. If you do that though, you’re missing some juicy and fun details.

How I built the Bookcase

Let’s start at the beginning. I was going to build a boring railing here:

start

The day before I was going to order the railing parts, Mrs. 1500 discovered someone who had built a bookcase instead:

Photo from Elephant Buffet
Photo from Elephant Buffet

Yes, what a wonderful idea! Except that I had no clue how to build something like this.

I checked out a bunch of books from the library about cabinetmaking and other related crap. I paged through the books for about 5 minutes before I tossed them aside and decided to do what I usually do, just make it up as I went along. What was the worst that could possibly happen?

Next, I bought a bunch of MDF from the local home improvement store. I went with MDF because the cabinet grade plywood would have cost me a small fortune and it all seemed warped. I have a hard enough time with straight wood. MDF is cheap and straight. Besides, I knew I’d be painting it white.

FIrst, I cut out the walls of the bookcase and screwed/glued them together:

walls

Next, I built support boxes on the floor from 2x4s. I nailed the walls between them and attached them to the back:

closer

closerstill

After that, I attached a 3/4” piece of MDF on top. That would have made for an ugly bookcase, so I glued/nailed blue stain pine wood flooring to the top. I put an edge around it, sanded it down and applied polyurethane. 

The final touch was running electricity to the thing and strategically placing some LEDs to light up the shelves. Here is the finished project:

IMG_20160314_192741710

IMG_20160314_192654468

IMG_20160314_192636327

IMG_20160314_192549056_HDR (1)

You can do it!

This thing turned out far better than I expected! In many facets of life, I lack confidence. This project was no exception. I was terrified that it would turn out looking like some horrific piece of junk.

I took my time, measured carefully, swore a lot, measured again, almost cut my thumb off (just kidding, maybe…) and consulted the Google when I needed to. Now, I have a beautiful, one of a kind piece of furniture in my home. I smile whenever I look at it*.

I encourage you to do the same in life. Think about projects and problems creatively. Instead of looking at Yelp to find a serviceman, look at YouTube and watch a couple how-to videos. You may fail in which case you can call the guy that you found on Yelp. I’ll bet you won’t though. I’m just a white collar dude who didn’t know how to do much of anything 15 years ago.

Finally, if you’re a guy who is happily married, keep your wife away from those guys with big you-know-whats. Beards, of course.

 

*I plumbed the house myself and also smile whenever I flush. It is gratifying knowing that the PVC that I laid out with my hands is shuttling my poop away. Yeah, I’m strange.

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Comments

  6. You had me going there for a while mate, I was worried where you were taking that story but it was a good recovery.

    The bookcase looks great too BTW – anyone would think that it was built by ate professional!

    And congratulations on the Business Insider feature too – I’ll bet you’re getting some decent hits on the blog today!
    InsiderAccountant recently posted…Can we renovate with less waste? I sure hope so!My Profile

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  7. This was hysterical. Personal finances turns soap opera, lol.

    Nice job on the bookcase! Having something hand-made in your home that you designed and built yourself sends off such a nice energy. And it does not look cookie cutter.

    I really want to redo my bathroom and I am mechanically challenged. But this post inspired me to muster up a bit of confidence. I’m sure I can at least figure out how to lay the tile myself.
    Lady FruFru recently posted…why is money such a sensitive topic?My Profile

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    • Thanks!

      “I really want to redo my bathroom and I am mechanically challenged.”

      Let me know if you need help or advice. Really! I’m probably not in your area, but there is always email or Skype. You can do it! Plus, it would make for a fun post.

      Tile is pretty easy and was the first remodeling skill I learned. Getting over the fear is the hardest part. I still remember how nervous I was the first time. I also remember how great it turned out!

      Reply

  10. I love the design, but I am concerned….is this a love affair that will last or is it a one-time thing. If it is long-term….you might want to work on that beard quickly….or grow longer hair and become part of a band….you could have some cool name like F.I.R.E. and cool band names.
    Jason recently posted…Afford Anything But Not EverythingMy Profile

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  11. Great post and a great job on the bookshelf!

    You are all over the darn place this week. Saw the Business Insider story off a yahoo link. Also, what brewery were the bearded amigos touring in the picture?

    Congrats, and keep that FI/RE going.

    Reply

  12. That’s a great job on the bookcase, and an even better idea, if I ever need to replace/change out a railing. Why not make it dual purpose and pretty to look at it?

    It’s awesome having youtube and google around. Anytime I get stuck on something, I can hit up those 2 and someone ahs taken the time to answer my question, and provide a nice filmed walk-through on how to do what I need. It’s a pretty awesome way to learn my own DIY skills.
    Mr. SSC recently posted…New job, New state, New Lifestyle! Maybe not…My Profile

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    • “Why not make it dual purpose and pretty to look at it?”

      Yes, that was exactly it! It didn’t consume much space and now we have a home for our books. Win-win.

      Google is like the best thing ever. You can do anything with Google.

      Reply

  13. Long time reader, first time commenter! Hilarious post as always, Mr. 1500, but I think my FAVORITE part was the random Bumbo sitting in the photo of the unfinished staircase. From the photos you’ve posted of your girls, I feel like they grew out of the Bumbo stage a while ago….? Is there a home improvement use for those? My husband will be very happy to hear it if so 😉

    Reply

    • There is no use for the Bumbo in home improvement. I used to babysit a friend’s baby, and the Bumbo is one of the best inventions ever. It has been passed along to another friend with a baby, as I no longer need it. Nice catch.

      Reply

      • Bumbo! That thing was so convenient for corralling the kids. Now that they can use their legs to walk, life is a lot more complicated!

        Reply

  14. Wow, that looks really, really good – good job! I’m glad that 1) you finished your project as sane as you were when you started it and 2) you liked Marian’s song (she has several other good ones, try “it’s good to have Jayne on your side” if you liked Firefly or “good morning Moon” if you never heard of Firefly). I have no comments on anyone’s you-know-what.

    We refinished some chairs last weekend. I love doing projects like this with my partner – so much fun! Although picking fabric is hard – there are like 12 million different designs 🙁

    Reply

    • Thanks for the kind comment! Yeah, I’m shocked how well it turned out. I thought that I would have botched it somehow, but no. Amazing!

      “Although picking fabric is hard – there are like 12 million different designs”

      I feel the same way when buying TP at the store. DON’T MAKE ME CHOOSE!

      Reply

  16. Great bookcase. You had me cracking up before I even made the jump to the rest of the post. If it’s any consolation, I’m not a big fan of beards. I’ll go about a week and a half without shaving before I’m clawing at my face like a cat with its paw in a mouse hole. Beards (or at least mine anyway) get way too itchy. Maybe that is a personal problem…

    Also glad your dishwasher dilemma is over.

    Reply

    • The only reason I have facial hair is because I’m too lazy to shave every day. Luckily, I don’t get itchy.

      Dishwasher passed test #3 today so is back to being installed under the counter instead of being sent out to be scrapped!

      Reply

  17. Great stuff, really like the finish on the top with the pine, well done sir. Also I’m not sure I can picture you with some large well developed beard without thinking of you as someone who has started wearing track suits every day and singing catchy commercials for fun, but then again maybe that has already started, you did say you were strange.
    Steven recently posted…Financial Independence Interview-No Nonsense LandlordMy Profile

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  18. I was starting to grow a big you-know-what, but I wasn’t man enough to handle it, so I trim it.
    I’m no bookworm, but that bookshelf/rail is sweeeet.
    Mr. FrugalWood’s design has a level of visual interest with the staggered look, plus I imagine it was easier to build, everything is separate boxes, 90 degree cuts except for the top. I like the top a lot, I have thought many many times about using flooring for things other than flooring, like counter tops. I think I’ll follow your top design :). I imagine you used flooring pieces and ran it through a table saw for the edge pieces? I really like that blue stain pine!
    Kyle recently posted…Theory of Savers and Spenders: Why Your Financial Advice is IgnoredMy Profile

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    • “I imagine it was easier to build, everything is separate boxes…”

      Exactly! This was far easier, so I’m totally thankful he came up with it.

      “I imagine you used flooring pieces and ran it through a table saw for the edge pieces?”

      Exactly!

      The funny thing about pine flooring is that you would never want to use it for flooring. It is far too soft. However, like you, I can think of a million non-flooring uses for it! Funny that you mentioned it because the Mrs. and I were just talking about a bunch of other projects that we’ll eventually do with the blue pine. Picture frames, coaster, some stuff to decorate the front of the house…

      Reply

      • There was a big old American Four Square house, with a sweeet 2 story horse and carriage barn I tried to buy near downtown ET, it had pine flooring throughout. I thought it actually looked cool with all the dings and dents all over, but you need to keep it protected with varnish so it doesn’t wear too much and you have to like that kind of look. Similar to marble counter tops, you have to be ok with some chips and dings that will happen over time. Embrace the imperfection.
        Kyle recently posted…Theory of Savers and Spenders: Why Your Financial Advice is IgnoredMy Profile

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        • “Embrace the imperfection.”

          I call it character! And people do countertops from marble? Yikes! Isn’t marble porous too? Granite (which I have) is bad enough in that department.

          Reply

  19. Beautiful! How did you install the shelves? Did you actually screw them in or did you use those little temporary shelf holder pin like thingers (yes, that is a very technical term in my world) that come with target like furniture so you can adjust the height when needed?

    I love posts like this; it’s very inspirational to see a wing-it project turn out so well. My 10 year old daughter saved up her money because she wanted a fort in her room. I never thought it would actually happen, but once she hit the $200 mark, we started shopping. Originally, the thought was to use a portion 0f an outdoor swingset, then I realized that could be built instead of bought for much less. Normally, I would outsource this type of job to my brother who comes at the fairly cheap cost of materials, beer, and pizza, but we decided to make this a girls project (once I went overboard reminding her what the difference in appearance would be with us doing it vs a skilled handyman uncle). With only a little help and guidance from my husband, we built the entire thing ourselves! Not only did it save her money which she used for fort accessories (you MUST have mini pillows to complete a fort!), even though it was far from perfect, I think she was pretty proud of herself…I was sure proud of both of us!

    Note to you men: play caution during the growing stage and how you trim. If not done properly and with conditioning care, sharp, pointy ends can result in some very uncontrollable physical responses and shudders when you go in for a kiss!

    Reply

    • Yeah, I used those little clips for the shelves. I was going to screw them in, but then I thought that it would be be cool to be able to move them around.

      Your daughter’s fort is awesome on so many levels! Maybe the best one is the confidence she acquired from working with her hands. Also, the creative thinking that went into it is good for the brain. And then the financial aspect too; very cool. I am trying to instill the same qualities in my girls.

      It makes me sad that we live in a society where people are afraid to work with their hands. You don’t have to rebuild your car’s engine, but changing the oil, taking apart a broken vacuum or putting stuff together from Ikea are all tasks anyone can do. The hardest part is getting over the fear…

      Reply

  22. Building something from scratch is always satisfying! AJ built me a beautiful triangular cedar planter on castors the other weekend to house my pepper plants. I’m always trying to squeeze in a little extra garden room on the balcony and sometimes standard designs won’t work.
    Christina recently posted…Berries and Herbs StartingMy Profile

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    • Plus, standard designs are no fun! Why limit yourself to what’s on the shelf at the store when your brain can come with millions of better ideas?!???

      Reply

  23. The beard issue seems to be more an issue of hair distribution vs. epic mess. Arguably, all three of you have the same amount of hair on your head – just differently distributed!
    It is all a matter of perspective.

    We took out an ugly railing, and planned to put in a bookcase, got the bid. Yowza! No rail to date, at least 10 years later (split level foyer). Someday….

    Reply

    • Ha ha, yes! I am rich on top! The other two are rich down below. We’re still talking about hair!

      “We took out an ugly railing, and planned to put in a bookcase, got the bid. Yowza!”

      Need help? It really wasn’t difficult.

      Reply

    • Thanks Maggie!

      Also, it’s OK if you’re husband doesn’t have a you-know-what. He is not any less of a man!

      Reply

  25. I think the bookshelf looks amazing. I’ve just acquired a large sheet of MDF from my boss (it was left over from a re-vamp of the gym and he was dumping it), cut it up out the back at work… squeezed it into the car and now it’s time to play with it for a new kitchen cabinet.

    For me, you share a massive secret here… the library and cabinet making books.

    Why the be-jesus didn’t I think of that.

    Thanks, good luck and thanks for the tip about having confidence and just having a go.

    Alan

    Reply

    • Start an anti-beard campaign! It will be like the Chewlies gum guy if you’ve ever seen Clerks!

      Future home-owner, eh? Proceed with caution!

      Reply

  28. Looks fantastic!
    Have you ever thought of starting a DIY blog? Maybe something for when you quit the full time gig? Or even a YouTube channel?!

    I love the DIY ethic. Took me a while to get into it but really it’s just Lego for adults isn’t it, just good fun (with a bit more swearing thrown in!)

    I agree that people shouldn’t be put off by lack of knowledge. 6 months ago I knew nothing about plumbing or woodworking and now I have a (very nearly) fully refurbished bathroom and kitchen. YouTube is amazing.!

    Cheers!
    theFIREstarter recently posted…january update – expenses, income, and battling a cream tea addictionMy Profile

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    • Forgot to say one of my next projects for this year is also a shelving unit to make some decent storage space out of an area that can’t really be used for much else and is definitely being under utilised in its current format.

      I’ll post some pics when it’s done 🙂

      Reply

    • Thanks! A DIY blog would be fun. I have loads of ideas too. The gears are turning…

      Have you posted pictures of your projects yet? I’d love to see them!

      Good luck on the shelves!

      Reply

  29. It looks gorgeous (by which I mean the bookcase of course… )! It really turned out awesome. That pine wood flooring on top is genius. Now I just need to get Mr. FW to build one of these in our house. Better yet, can we just bribe you with beer to come build one for us :)? P.S. Lost things have indeed been located in the beard before.
    Mrs. Frugalwoods recently posted…The Tyranny of Time OptimismMy Profile

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    • Thanks for the kind comments Mrs. Frugalwoods! I think that the Mr. and I could build some really cool stuff if we put our beards together…

      Reply

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