I love writing about products that exemplify ridiculous consumerism. In the past, I’ve written about the $240 lunch bag purse, $450 swim trunks and the $6,000 disco toilet. Today, I bring you the $3000 stroller. But first, take a trip down memory lane with me.
Think back to the time when you were one-year old. I know, it was probably a long time ago, but bear with me. Did you lament the fact that mom and dad made you wear clothes from K-Mart? Did you hate your parents for buying you off-brand diapers that made your butt as red as a baboon’s? Were you embarrassed to have second-hand toys? Were you scarred from the other babies at the park pointing fingers in your direction and laughing?
HELL NO! We don’t remember any of that because we were babies and babies can’t form memories! Babies sit in their little swings and laugh at their own farts in between pooping themselves. Life is simple and probably blissful (seems pretty good to me). There is no peer pressure.
So why on earth do parents buy designer clothes or similar accessories for their infants? Well, we all know why. It’s to impress the other parents. What a dumb exercise.
Roll like a Goth
Anyway, my blood pressure went up a couple notches when I read about the new Aston Martin stroller that you can buy for the princely sum of $3,000. Now, Aston Martin makes fine automobiles. I lust after their sexy shapes. But a stroller? Come on. What are you thinking putting your name on something like this Aston Martin?
Unlike their cars, this thing is plain ugly. It looks like something a goth parent (do goths reproduce?) would buy Baby Munster. I have to admit that it actually scares me a bit. It looks like an egg sack from a horror movie about aliens. I’d be afraid that if I looked into this thing to see the baby, an alien would leap out and latch onto my face.
Where do you draw the line on baby spending?
In our own sphere of friends and family, we see people that struggle with money, but somehow find the means to buy their children designer duds. Here’s an idea; go to the thrift store and put that money towards their college! Your baby doesn’t care about clothes, but your teen will care (hopefully) about student loans.
I can understand springing for nicer clothes with older kids. Teenagers can be just plain mean. Even then though, I’m not going to go crazy.
Every day is Halloween
Now, I have to admit that the Steampunk Stroller would be cool on Halloween. I’d dress it up with some fake blood and scare the neighbors (only thing scarier would be me in those swim trunks). Other than that, they can keep this thing. Unless they’re going to throw in an Aston Martin. I’m game then.
What do you think of the stroller? If you have kids, how do you acquire their stuff?
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