I’ve been all serious lately, talking about Retirement gone Wrong again and again. Time to lighten things up a bit with some fun ranting!
If you ever pass through the Denver Airport, keep your eyes open. I was at the airport this week and it’s like a giant haunted house. First, take a look at some of the murals. They are completely creepy. I’m not sure what they’re all about, but Mr. Gas Mask/AK-47 is pretty scary.
However, the main (mane?) attraction is the Evil Horse. Check this thing out. It’s outside waiting to greet victims airport visitors on their way in. It has glowing red eyes that peer into your soul. This thing is scary as hell, but the truth is even better. Before the sculpture was complete, Evil Horse fell over and killed its creator. Sounds like urban legend and I didn’t believe it either, but it’s true.
_________________________________________
When I’m driving on the highway, I love to just set the cruise control and well, cruise. This scenario happens all the time: Like a good driver, I stay in the right lane. Sooner or later, I’ll come up behind a slow driver and move into the left lane to pass. Just when I’m passing, the other driver gets the idea that they need to go faster than me, so they step on the gas. Fine, I move back to the right lane behind him. A short time later, they slow down, I catch up, and the whole thing repeats. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr…
_________________________________________
Mrs. 1500 has a super-power. She can drive the car in such a way that the “low gas” warning light just happens to come on only when I drive. I don’t think she’s pumped gas in about 10 years. (Mrs. 1500 note: I had to pump my own gas last Saturday when Mr. 1500 was out of town, and I didn’t much care for it.)
_________________________________________
Shortest book every written: Peaceful Road Trips with the 1500 Children. Everything always start out happy and joyous. 30 minutes later, the trip has devolved into Lord of the Flies, Car Edition. There is screaming, violence and chaos: “She’s looking at me!” “I’m bored!!” “When are we going to eat!!” “I have to poop!!!”
_________________________________________
The last time I was on a plane, there was a small child who would unleash an ear piercing shriek about every 2 minutes. The parents thought it was the cutest thing ever. No one else did.
_________________________________________
I don’t enjoy the Las Vegas Strip (am I the only adult who doesn’t?). However, my parents live in the city, so I end up there frequently. I don’t gamble and the “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas” attitude makes people behave terribly.
During my last visit, I was standing out front one of the casinos when I noticed some guy inside running top speed towards the exit. I thought he was being chased by security. Nope. He charged threw the doors, made it over to the railing that I was leaning against, and puked his brains out. Not more than an hour later, the scene repeated itself in another casino, only puker #2 wasn’t fast enough to make it outside or to a bathroom. What happens in Vegas may stay in Vegas, but what you put in your stomach may not stay there, especially if you’ve just pounded 11 beers.
_________________________________________
How about you Reader? What annoys you when flying, driving or ballooning? Unleash your rant!
Okay, now I’m even more freaked out about Denver’s possessed bronco than I was when I first saw it! I had no idea it had LITERALLY killed someone – the friends that we visited out in Denver didn’t tell us about that. When we flew into Colorado, we arrived at night, and that thing’s eyes were just glowing demonically in the darkness. My first reaction, naturally, was “wtf is that?!” as we drove by; it didn’t feel like a great omen to start the trip out with!
Kali @ CommonSenseMillennial recently posted…CSM’s I ♥ Autumn Tag
WTF is right? Maybe WTH (what the horse?)?
Whomever commissioned that thing had some crazy stuff going on in their head. Does Charles Manson design airports?
However, I do hope they keep the horse. It grabs attention. Much better than a boring waterfall or mountain lion.
Haha that is funny about the driving situation. And those are the worst flights. On one of our last trips, an older woman was on the plane with us and later in the flight we hit some turbulence. She start chanting some scary things and screaming that everyone was going to die. It was terrifying!
Michelle recently posted…Is Working from Home Cheaper?
Whoah, that is scary. Those kinds of incidents get planes turned around these days.
Oh I hate Vegas! The only think I would conceivable go there for would be to see Bette Midler in concert before one of us kicks the bucket. Experience the Divine? That would be worth putting up with the rest of Vegas for. Sadly I don’t know anyone else who would agree, so it’d have to be a solo trip.
Mrs PoP @ Planting Our Pennies recently posted…What You Need To Know About Flood Insurance Changes – Part 1
Ha! Some of the shows there are pretty good, but the thing is that they are really expensive. I wince at throwing down $10 for a movie ticket. Many of the shows in Vegas are over $100 a PoP.
I know… but where else am I ever going to see Bette Midler in concert? She would be worth it =)
Mrs. Pop @ Planting Our Pennies recently posted…What You Need To Know About Flood Insurance Rate Changes – Part 2
According to some “conspiracy theorists” the mural at the Denver airport is a guide/map to tell people where to go in TSHTF and that there’s a bunker somewhere near the airport if you are privileged enough to have been given the clues to decipher it.
With as much driving as I do for my job I have plenty of driving peeves. Another thing I can’t stand is when someone is approaching you fast so you move over to be a nice driver and let them continue on their way. Only for them to slow down and parallel you until you come up to another car and then they slow down to parallel them. That makes me want to start carrying some extra wrenches to toss out the window when I can finally get in front of them.
JC @ Passive-Income-Pursuit recently posted…Semi Recent Buys
I had never heard that theory! One thing I forgot to mention/take a picture of is the pyramids. There are, what looks like Aztec pyramids in the airport now. Didn’t they sacrifice people on those things?
I was going to mention this. Check out all of the conspiracy theories surrounding the airport!! There’s also the thing with the runways and the ahem, swatzika (forgot the spelling…on purpose) Colorado is central to a lot of crazy theories. Maybe it’s the altitude…or the pot?
Wow, I wasn’t aware of any of that! I’m telling you, the place was designed by Charles Manson!
Bad drivers are one of my biggest pet peeves; driving stresses me out more than anything sometimes. I can’t stand when people cut me off only to go slowly. If you were in such a rush, step on it! I am not a slow driver (oops) so it can get pretty annoying. The worst is when three people are all matching speeds in three separate lanes on the highway and you can’t get around anyone.
Vegas doesn’t really interest me at all. I’ve heard good/fun things about it, but I don’t gamble and I’m not into parties with a million other people close by me.
E.M. recently posted…All Work, No Play
Ha, I can’t stand the lane blockers either. It is at times like that when I start having ridiculous thoughts about buying a flying car (or maybe a weapon :)). http://www.terrafugia.com/
Vegas is an interesting place. It is worth visiting once just to see the insanity of it all. There are a ton of great outdoor activities around Vegas too. Whatever you do, don’t go in the summer. WAY too hot.
Couldn’t agree more about the visiting Vegas once. It doesn’t cost anything to walk through and check out the absolute insanity. My first thought when I was at the MGM on a work trip? I am standing in a billion dollar building purely designed to take my money. Beautifully dangerous for the consumer.
writing2reality recently posted…Alive, Well, and Still Investing!
Welcome back W2R! Very happy that you’re back and running! Always enjoyed hearing about your peer lending adventures.
You’re not the only adult who doesn’t like Vegas. I went there when I was 21 – prime Vegas time… didn’t care for it what.so.ever. It’s like sensory overload, and not in a good way!
So the one time I went in a hot-air balloon it was over the Santa Rosa vineyards (cheaper than going all the way to Napa) and it was a crash landing of sorts. The balloon thunked to the ground with such momentum we tipped on our side and it was a huge basket with sixteen people in it (in different sections)… it was messy. Perhaps that is how all hot-air balloons land, but it wasn’t my favourite.
By the Mrs. 1500, I don’t know the last time I pumped gas either. And my fiancé rarely drives the (one) car, but he always has to fill it up 🙂
Alicia @ Financial Diffraction recently posted…road-tripping on a budget.
Yeah, I don’t understand the attraction to Vegas. If my parents didn’t live there, I”d never go there again.
Balloons scare the crap out of me! I’m sure accidents are few and far between, but when they happen, they are horrific. Just as tornadoes seem to be attracted to double-wides, balloons seem to gravitate towards power lines….
LOL!!! I fly into Denver about 4 times a year and that damned horse never ceases to freak me out.
I know, right? I tell myself not to look at it, but I can’t help it. It pulls me in with it’s evil eyes.
When flying, I’d like to pound on the heads of those who drag impossibly over-sized carry-ons aboard and try to stuff them into the overhead bins, totally unaware that they are holding up the line of passengers behind them and the plane’s departure with their futile struggles.
People are so rude. The worst of humanity seems to come out on planes. Maybe all the problems are magnified because there are large number of people crammed into a dry, but stinky tin can. At least there is stuff to look at out the windows.
I’m not much of a Vegas fan, either, though I did love it when I found a chip on the floor once that helped us stay there for a couple of more days. I love using “I’ve got the conch!” when I feel people are talking over me…. only about 10% get the reference. 🙂
anna recently posted…I’m Over Budget in My Pants – Fall Slim Down Challenge
Wow, that must have been one helluva chip! Anna must hang out near the High Limit tables!
The conch phrase is awesome and I’m surprised that even 10% get it!
Lord of the Flies? Oh, crap. Which one’s Jack and which one’s Ralph? I taught Lord of the Flies to my tenth graders when student teaching, and as a reward I showed the 1990 film to the class. Big mistake. They were not ready for the language.
Amazingly the whole movie is out there on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7ffCWSTNYM
Done by Forty recently posted…Notes from Peru
Yep, LOTF. What a great book; one of the best in fact.
I hate the strip in Vegas, but I kinda like the rest of the area – especially out near Boulder City. I was just there in my travels last week (visiting a really cool data center off Decatur), and I almost managed to not go near the strip. I say almost, because a colleague was staying on the strip, and I agreed to drop him off at his hotel before I drove out to Hoover Dam.
But I don’t think gambling is fun, and last time I was in Vegas over 10 years ago for a conference, all I did was ride roller coasters……
Mom @ Three is Plenty recently posted…Was (Is) College worth the expense?
Yeah, completely agreed! Some of the areas around Vegas are spectacular. Red Rocks is super awesome and very close: http://www.vegas.com/attractions/off-the-strip/red-rock-canyon/
Southern Utah is wonderful as well.
Having my flight canceled and instead of giving me another flight, they put me on a bus. I’d have to say that was my biggest grrrr moment as far as airlines are concerned. I also remember another time when I was sitting on the plan and right before we taxied out I saw one of the ground crew running toward the plane carrying a bag. As he got closer, I realized he was carrying MY bag. Said bag was carrying $100+ worth of Wisconsin cheese for co-workers who paid me in advance. Yeah, very happy I didn’t leave without it.
Micro recently posted…Story time: 1st day of college
Oh man, losing that cheese would have been a bummer. There is nothing like WI cheese. Well, the beer and fish fries are right on too.
I’m heading up to Madison in about a month and I’m dying to have some curds too!
HAHAHAHA!!! Mrs. 1500 did not much care for pumping her own gas. That is funny stuff. I am totally riding that evil horse into guitar lessons on Halloween. I am sure the Denver airport won’t mind a bit.
It’s gonna be tough for the docs the remove the iPhone from the driver’s rectum who hits us because they were texting while driving.
cj recently posted…In Defense of Lord Henry Wotton and Fun
cj!
If you ever go death metal, a picture of you on the worse would make an awesome album cover. Do you have any black leather and/or medieval weapons?
I almost fell off my chair laughing after reading the “Peaceful Road Trips with the 1500 Children” section!!
Road trips aren’t so bad for us quite yet, but 5pm – 7:30 pm in my house every single night feels like Lord of the Flies!!
Brad @ RichmondSavers.com recently posted…A Lifetime of Financial Advice in your Wallet
Ah, yes, Vegas. . .quite possibly the most plasticy (in more ways than one) town ever. Except for maybe in China (I saw this being built when I was in Beijing a few years ago): http://www.pbs.org/newshour/art/blog/2013/03/china-uses-copycat-architecture-to-modernize-define-itself.html
I have the great pleasure of heading to Vegas for not one but 2 work conferences next year. My goal is to figure out the more productive/mellow side of Vegas when I go. . .seems to me there might be some interesting mountain biking around there, or maybe I need to increase my brain cells by visiting an engineering marvel like the Hoover Dam (get a history lesson in while I’m out there). There is only so much sensory overload I can take with hanging out on the strip.
Red Rock Canyon is awesome and right outside the strip. There are a ton of great hikes there.
I had never heard about that in China. Has anyone there had an original idea since gunpowder?
Hahaha, those were great! You should write a children’s book about traveling with kids in the car.
My rant: NYC/NYS/Federal government taxed my measly company bonus at 53% so I basically ended up with nothing.
Broke Millennial recently posted…Frugal Find Friday: Couch to 5K app
Are bonuses really taxed high though? For example, if you are paid weekly and get at $5000 bonus, it looks to Uncle Sam like you’re making $250,000+/year so you pay a lot in taxes that week. When you file your tax return, you’ll get the money back. At least that is how I think it works.
Bonuses are not taxed that high. It’s just the withholding rate on a bonus, which they assume is at a higher marginal rate. This withholding % is not even remotely related to the actual tax liability calculation, so you don’t have to worry. You pay your tax liability and the amouth withheld over that liability is refunded.
Brad @ RichmondSavers.com recently posted…Take Your Family to Disney World For Free: Step-by-Step Instructions