Mindy and I are at a big point in our lives. Our new place is done and we have mostly moved in. (More on The Project in an upcoming post.) But we also had to get our prior home ready to sell. This took Maximum Effort because:
- We had accumulated a lot of stuff and didn’t want to take it with us. Lots. Of. Stuff.
- Redundant tools. I somehow ended up with multiple examples many things. I don’t need 7 wire strippers. Or 5,058,498 zip ties.
- Tools that we’ll never use again. It was fun installing a nail-down wood floor. But we’ll most likely never do it again. I hope the floor nailer finds a nice home.
- Building materials. I kept a lot of stuff around, just in case. Just in case never arrived for most of it.
- Clothes that no longer fit or were worn out. I lost a lot of weight after quitting my job. I also dressed poorly. While my style hasn’t improved much (Costco Casual!), at least I know how to wear clothes that fit better.
- Books. I love you books, but we’ve gone full-on Kindle. My eyes can no longer read your words and the Kindle makes them big.
- The home had a lot of little things that needed to be finished. I’m good at getting a project to 95% completion. Then I get bored and move on to something else. When it comes time to sell, all of that 5% stuff has to be finished. This included installing door knobs, touch up paint, fastening transition pieces, cabinet toe kicks and lots of other random stuff.
The amount of work was significant and the heat made it worse. I’m not a fan of temperatures above 85 and there was no shortage of 90+ degree days recently. Oof.
In addition to getting our old house to market, I also had to finish projects on the new one. The biggest was the installation of solar panels. I had decided to do it myself, but when it came time to install them, daytime temperatures were regularly flirting with 100 degrees. The last thing I wanted was to be on a south facing, black roof in the heat. I decided to punt the project to the fall. Then the building department let me know that they wouldn’t issue me a certificate of occupancy until it was done. So up to the roof I went. Turn the volume to 11 for this one:
And then it was summer break for our girls. My rule is this: If they ask me to do something, my default is yes.
There just was no time. I love going to the gym, but I’ve been there once in the past 3 months.
I sound like Mr. Complainy Pants. Probably because I am. But life is good. In between it all, we went to Bonaire with friends and that was spectacular:
Now that it’s all done, life is feeling better. And perhaps better in a way that I haven’t felt in a long time.
Mindy Says/ Inflection Point?
Mindy insisted that if we were going to build a house, we had to outsource most of the work. My mind instantly went to:
Why? If I can do it, it’s silly to pay someone!
But outsourcing was the right idea. Here is what I I had initially planned to do, but did not:
- wiring
- plumbing
- deck
- tile work
- kitchen and bathroom cabinets and vanities respectively
I ended up installing:
- an energy recovery ventilator (ERV)
- hydronically heated floors
- a walkable glass panel system for the deck (the carpenters wouldn’t touch this)
- the aforementioned solar panels
Bottom row: ERV ducts, walkable glass decking, solar panels
That work was enough. Mindy was right, I’m glad we outsourced almost all of it.
And now for the the only the second time in our marriage, we’re moving into a home that isn’t a project. It feels good. As long I had those tasks outstanding, I couldn’t relax.
Sometimes you don’t realize you’re in a rut until you’re out of it. Or you don’t realize how deep that rut is. I’m curious to see how my happiness levels are doing in 3 months. My main question is this: Was this just a temporary high or has my baseline been reset?
I hope it’s the latter and this is a true inflection point. While I retired from a formal job almost 10 years ago, I’ve still been working pretty hard since. More on that in a moment.
FinCon, Palm Springs, Pacific Coast Highway
Mindy and I are currently attending FinCon in Palm Springs.
I’m not interested in learning anything, but it’s nice to see old friends. I enjoy road trips and have some things to pick up in SoCal, so I drove. Or to be clearer, the car drove. And when the car is driving, you can take photos:
After the conference is over, I’ll drive to the ocean and then take the Pacific Coast Highway north. I plan to stop at every beach that looks mildy interesting and fart around. I’ll go as far north as Redwood National Park before heading home.
Silly Achievement!
People react in curious ways to trauma. What I learned in therapy* was that my high achieving ways were a maladaption; the behavior was a way for me to not feel worthless.
*sigh*
Being highly motivated is a better way to deal with trauma then drugs or violence, but I still wasn’t right. And it isn’t easy to identify:
- Person A is on drugs: That is a very bad choice.
- Person B (me) works 80 hour weeks for a decade: Wow, what a go-getter!
The past 25 years have been a self-imposed grind. Mindy and I have lived in 10 houses! We’ve made a lot of money with the live-in flipping, but it wasn’t healthy either. How much sleep have I skipped? How much needless stress have I caused myself?
And all the success in the world won’t squash your demons. They’ll still scream somewhere in your subconscious until you deal with them.
I’m in a better place now. Hell, I’m even OK with just walking around mindlessly for hours, not even listening to a podcast to better myself! Just don’t ask me to sit around for long. That I will not do!
*Peter Attia does a great job of explaining this in Chapter 17 of his book, Outlive.
More 1500 Days!!!
You can also find me (and the dinosaurs) at:
- YouTube: My channel is mostly devoted to home improvement, but I have some other material coming up soon too.
- Instagram: Pretty pictures of dinosaurs, sunsets, and nail guns!
- Twitter: Spontaneous, often insane, ramblings
- Coworking space: On the surface, MMM HQ is a coworking space. Look a little deeper and you’ll see that we’re really building community. The members of MMM HQ are some of the finest people I know
- Buying a Tesla? Use my referral code to get some perks!
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