Want to know one of the best life tips for living a rewarding life? Here it is:
Commit to projects that scare the shit out of you and make you deeply uncomfortable.
Why? Growth doesn’t happen when you stay safe in your comfort zone. Think about it. Extraordinary accomplishments require extraordinary effort and discomfort:
- Want to become a physician? You better study your ass off.
- Want to run a marathon? You better hit the pavement.
- Want to play a Chopin piece? Better get busy on the piano.
Outside of your comfort zone
Is.
Where.
Your best life.
Happens.
Glossphobia
Public speaking is terrifying for most people. Supposedly, many fear it more than death. I’m no exception.
When I spoke at CSU back in 2017, it was my first time in front of an audience since university. The CSU experience was so terrifying that my leg shook. Thankfully, there was a podium to hide my wayward limb behind.
But, the experience was also rewarding, so I volunteered to speak again at a Camp FI in Florida. I went on to give talks at Camp FI Midwest, Camp FI Rocky Mountain, and a couple of Chautauquas. Every talk went a little better and I felt myself evolving. I became a more confident person. Interactions with other humans didn’t terrify me anymore. After the Camp FI Rocky Mountain talk, someone in the audience paid me one of the nicest compliments I’ve ever received. It was this:
You should do stand up comedy.
To understand why it was such a huge compliment, we have to take a walk down Memory Lane.
*** queue the weird, go-backwards-in-time music ***
As a kid, I had speech impediments. I stuttered. I couldn’t make certain words come out of my mouth. It sucked. So, not only did I hate speaking in front of groups, I hated speaking at all. Through therapy, I was able to overcome most of it. But, kids can be assholes and the damage was done. Hello, introversion!
*** back to the present day ***
The person who told me that I should do stand-up comedy is Diania Merriam. Over the course of the weekend, I got to know her and discovered that she’s a hell of a human.
And, she invited me to speak at the conference she created, EconoMe. What the hell is EconoMe? I ripped off this blurb directly from the EconoMe website:
EconoMe provides dynamic speakers on financial independence as well as networking opportunities to link you with folks with similar interests. It’s like reading and listening to a month’s worth of blogs/podcasts all in one day!
The question you should ask about events like EconoMe is this:
I know about FIRE; I have to save money and then I can quit my job when I have enough.
What else is there?
There is a lot more. Money is just the starting point. I find these questions much more interesting:
What happens after I have enough money to quit?
How do I find and build community?
How do I discover my passion and purpose?
How do I overcome my fears?
How do I build a satisfying life that’s true to myself?
The money part of the FIRE equation isn’t easy, but it is simple. The 4% Rule is basic math. Figuring out life is much more interesting, challenging, and ultimately, more rewarding.
I quit my job in 2017 and life as an early retiree has been challenging and surprising. It’s also been great. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
I won’t lie and tell you I have all of the answers. However, I believe that I have a thing or two to teach. At EconoMe, I hope that I can help and inspire you.
FAQ
When and where?
EconoMe will take place the weekend of November 13th at the University of Cincinnati.
What happens at EconoMe?
Saturday, there are talks, breakout sections, and a big party. On Sunday, we’ll hike, tour a brewery, and more. See the schedule here.
What will be speaking about?
- Conquering fear to live your best life.
- Lessons learned in my pursuit of early retirement.
- Why the word retirement sucks even though I just used it.
Tell me more!
I plan to talk for 30 minutes. I’ll discuss what holds us back and why. My main goal is to inspire you to do something awesome.
You’ll learn. You”ll laugh. You’ll cry. Hopefully, that last one isn’t the result of a shitty talk!
Will the dinosaurs be there?
Can I touch them?
Sure, but they bite. Remember that they are dinosaurs.
Who else will be there?
The lineup is pretty great!
- Bitches Get Riches
- Kevin Ha, the Financial Panther
- Naseema McElroy from financially intentional
- Joe Saul-Sehy from the Stacking Benjamins podcast
- Angel Cellucci
- And there are more to come!
More about the speakers here.
See You In Cincinnati?
Perhaps the best parts of FIRE life are the random opportunities that occasionally materialize and send your life on a different path. If you told me 5 years ago that I’d become a public speaker, I would have told you that you were insane. But here I am. EconoMe will be a crowd of over 500, my biggest room yet. Oof.
If you do plan to go to EconoMe, click here to get an early bird, discounted ticket. If not, perhaps we’ll meet at some other FIRE event or when you’re passing through Colorado. See you soon.
Join the 10s who have signed up already!
Subscribing will improve your life in incredible ways*.
*Only if your life is pretty bad to begin with.
The real question…. Are you going to visit Jungle Jim’s while you are in Cincy?
The looks like an interesting event, I might have to think about going assuming my wife’s work doesn’t have a meeting that weekend, but I won’t know that for a couple months
I have never been to Cincinnati or heard about Jungle Jim’s. I just googled it and I’m still not quite sure that I comprehend it!
It looks like they had a weekend of fire, but not the kind I’m used to talking about: https://youtu.be/sld9sQohI50
Jungle Jim’s is worth the visit! Just to wander the aisles and see the sheer plethora of products and packages from around the world and imagine what they must mean to people…
Wow, I’m there!
+1 to Jungle Jim’s. We’re an hour north of Cincy and are planning to attend EconoMe. It’ll be good to see you again, Carl! We haven’t attended any FIREy conferences since 2019 UK Chautauqua and are stoked about EconoMe.
John! It will be great to see you again! How is life away from Silicon Valley?
Life in Ohio is great! Especially with both sets of grandparents near by. We bought a smallish house in a great neighborhood for pennies on the dollar for what we’d pay in CA. The quality of life here is quite high (even during the snowy months). Libraries and parks everywhere!
Still working for Silicon Valley and loving it. I’ve got a quiet office in the house I can work from. Sara is looking to get an Ohio teaching license but will have to to back to school for a bit. That’s okay though, she likes school and the University she’ll attend is a 10 minute bike ride away. 🙂
100% this. Everytime we go through Cincy we stop and get some of our favorite goodies from around the world
I would also note, there are two locations. Go to the original one on the Northside in Fairfield, OH on Dixie Hwy.
“Outside of your comfort zone. Is. Where. Your best life. Happens.”
Somebody ought to put this on their headstone. Great post Carl.
There’s a lot more to life after the money math is complete. I can see an argument that it just enables bigger, more difficult, more meaningful decisions. A post-scarcity world would be filled with humans (and dinos!) finding their way.
And you’ll knock out the speech—if you just be you.
Chris@TTL recently posted…Is the FIRE Movement Fracturing Into Silos and Extremes?
Thank you for the kind words! I have found that just being me (mostly goofy) is the way to go.
My favorite headstone quote so far was in the Key West cemetery: “I told you I was sick.”
Comedy gold…forever.
I was on the fence about applying for a Director position at work. It involves a lot more responsibility, public speaking and leading meetings all of which are my biggest fears. I am qualified for the position but those activities are holding me back from applying. Your article lit a fire under me and gave me the courage to pursue this opportunity. I may not get it but I will never regret not trying. Thank you for writing this. You are making a huge difference to your reader’s lives.
Hey Mark! If you want it, do it. You can get past it.
The key for me regarding public speaking was this: Similar to writing this blog, I had to find my own voice. Not the literal speaking voice, but the style in which I delivered my words. At university, I was taught to stand up behind a podium and give a stodgy, boring talk. Then, Alan Donegan taught me to be fun. So, I put my personality into it. As soon as I can make the audience laugh or I see people smiling, everything gets easier. The humor part may not be transferable to your situation, but maybe you can find some way to make it fun for you?
The other thing I learned is that the audience is a reflection of you. If you’re nervous, the audience will see it and be nervous too which in turn will make you more nervous! However, if it looks like you’re having fun, the audience will have fun too and the whole gig suddenly becomes much easier. So, if you can eke out a smile or laugh from the audience, the virtuous cycle starts and it becomes fun.
Again, similar to my post, it seems very weird to be giving advice on public speaking. I’m the last person who I ever thought would be doing this. But, that’s also why I know that you can do it too.
Finally, thank you so much for the very kind words. They mean a ton. If I can help you in any other way, ping me here or over email mr1500 at 1500days dot com.
good luck and enjoy. It’s impressive the type of community gatherings that can get arranged! Looking forward to the highlights reel.
Hey, as long as you bring over your dinosaurs and use them in your talk, people will fall in love with you!
I used to be petrified of public speaking as well. It turns out, it had nothing to do with me. I learned that when I eat a large amount of food, it roughly takes 6 – 8 hours before I digest fully and my heart beats to the normal beat. If I eat a large amount of food, my heart actually starts pounding to digest.
So when I was afraid to go up and public speak, I thought it was because of me. Turns out, it was because of my eating habits. I can regularly go up and publicly speak without caring whether it’ll go good or bad now as long as I plan my meals well.
David @ Filled With Money recently posted…A Penny Saved is a Penny Earned is Not Right
Ummm, Covid. Heard of it?
That’s some pretty nasty sarcasm. Check the FAQs: https://economeconference.com/faqs/
Yes, you are correct, it was nasty. I apologize for my thoughtless comment. Please delete it, if you wish.
Chuck
No worries! I’m quite sarcastic myself.
COVID life isn’t easy either. I’ll be very happy when it’s done!
What happens if the 2022 dates need to change because the COVID restrictions are going longer than expected? Is there a possibility the location of the even would move to a city that might be more lenient or that happens to have lower cases?
The date may be pushed back, but the location will stay the same. This is from the FAQ page:
EconoMe 2021 is scheduled for November 13th & 14th, and we are expecting an audience of 700 people. Sounds like a great way to spread a virus, right? If it is still unsafe to gather in a large group come November, the event will be rescheduled for March 19th & 20th 2022. You will be notified by Sept 1, 2021 if the event is being pushed into 2022 so please don’t purchase your flight or reserve your accommodations before then. Whether the event is held in November or March, you can get a full refund up to 30 days prior to the event. Or you can choose to hold onto your ticket and apply it to any future EconoMe event. EconoMe will not be canceled and we will not pivot to a virtual event, we will continue to reschedule until we can meet in person!
Outside of your comfort zone
Is.
Where.
Your best life.
Happens.
Is this your own personal spin on this mantra? I love it, can I share on my social media?
Go you, getting out of your comfort zone…big time. Public speaking has to be on my list of most hated things to do, along with attending large public events like econome. I think the definition of an introvert probably has my name beside it. I am a long time reader of your blog, but this is my first time commenting! Are you an introvert per chance?
A couple of years ago I pushed myself out of my comfort zone, and hooked up with a guy who wanted to retire to a foreign land, and we’re presently writing the pages of that book and I am at that crossroads of FIRE …figuring out, “How do I discover my passion and purpose?” Hopefully the cajillion ideas dancing around my head will unify some time soon.